That xenogon was absolutely worth BD’s still-redic post-discount price, it is hands-down one of the goddamn best things I own. Not toys, just things in general. House burning down? I’d run in and come out clutching this motherfucker all swaddled up tight in a blanket. “nick what’s that” no shh it’s not important
goddamn but if the fact postblocker exists isn’t one of the biggest things saving my sanity lately
I WON’T FORGET YOU CLIPPY
CLOPPY
FUCK, GOD FUCKING DAMNIT
I’d fuck coppy I don’t give a shit, I’d fuck a lot of things
put me in a room with coppy, that sad old woodsman and a handful of dusty-ass skeletons and see what fuckin goes down
IMAGINE COPPY’S SHY LOOK ON HIS FACE AS YOU REACH INTO HIS PAPER TRAY AND STROKE HIS INNERMOST SURFACES
IMAGINE OPENING UP HIS SIDE TO GENTLY FINGER HIS DELICATE INNER WORKINGS
IMAGINE THIS GOD AWFUL COPY MACHINE AND TACTILE SEX
what if tfp soundwave don’t got a dick, but all his tentacles are sensitive
and he’s real stoic and work-focused so he never lets this interfere with his productivity or anything important, but
every time he’s using them on a computer console, every time he’s picking something up, every time he uses one to tap someone on the shoulder
that’s his dingle-dangles
Posthole 